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100 Questions

So, I borrowed this from ate Shaira’s blog kasi buryong na ko. haha. Questions  are from @TheTumblrPostsโ€™s Tweet: https://twitter.com/TheTumblrPosts/status/811964901178675200?s=0

1. What is your middle name? Federico

2. How old are you? 18

3. When is your birthday? 08 November 1998

4. What is your zodiac sign? Scorpio


5. What is your favorite color? Blue/Black

6. Whatโ€™s your lucky number? 8

7. Do you have any pets? Kuto. HAHAHAHA. None.

8. Where are you from? Quezon City, Philippines

9. How tall are you? 6 ft. charot. 4″11 ๐Ÿ˜ญ

10. What shoe size are you? 6


11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
8 pairs. Pero isang pares lang talaga yung paulit-ulit kong ginagamit.

12. What was your last dream about? Nasa Shingeki No Kyojin daw ako. Kasama ko sina Eren at Levi na umaattack ng titans. ๐Ÿ™…


13. What talents do you have? Ang maghintay at umasa. 

14. Are you psychic in any way? Hindi. Pero madali akong makapick-up ng body language and I can read easily between the lines.


15. Favorite song? Riptide – Vance Joy

16. Favorite movie? Shawshank Redemption, Before Sunrise – Richard Linklater

17. Who would be your ideal partner? Hmm.

18. Do you want children? Yes

19. Do you want a church wedding? No sa ngayon. ๐Ÿ˜”

20. Are you religious? No eh.


21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Yes


22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? No.


23. Have you ever met any celebrities? Yes.


24. Baths or showers? Baths.


25. What color socks are you wearing? White.


26. Have you ever been famous? No.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? No.


28.What type of music do you like? Lahat. Mahal ko ang music.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? No.


30. How many pillows do you sleep with?
Three.
31. What position do you sleep in? Patagilid.

32. How big is your house? Idk. Basta maliit and 2 floors.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? Pandesal at kape.


34. Have you ever fired a gun? Water/Pellet Gun. ๐Ÿ’ช haha


35. Have you ever tried archery? No! Pero gusto ko sana.


36. Favorite clean word? Shoots


37. Favorite swear word? Shet

38. Whatโ€™s the longest youโ€™ve ever gone without sleep? 22 hrs


39. Do you have any scars? No


40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
Secret nga ee. Pano ko malalaman?



41. Are you a good liar? YES


42. Are you a good judge of character? Yes

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? Yes


44. Do you have a strong accent? No


45. What is your favorite accent? Wala.

46. What is your personality type? IxFJ


47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? ๐Ÿ˜ฏ Idk rin.


48. Can you curl your tongue? ๐Ÿ˜ Yes


49. Are you an innie or an outie? Innie, but I also love it when I’m out.

50. Left or right handed? Right handed

51. Are you scared of spiders? No

52. Favorite food? Eggs. ๐Ÿ›๐Ÿ“


53. Favorite foreign food? Spanish bread. Hahaha ๐Ÿž

54. Are you a clean or a messy person? Clean


55. Most used phrase?  oks lang

56. Most used word? hahahaha/charot


57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 2 hrs.

58. Do you have much of an ego? No


59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? Suck


60. Do you talk to yourself? Yes


61. Do you sing to yourself? Yes

62. Are you a good singer? No. Huhu

63. Biggest fear? Losing my love ones ๐Ÿ˜–

64. Are you a gossip? No. 

65. Best dramatic movie youโ€™ve ever seen? War Horse. Marami pa ata though eto agad yung pumasok sa isip ko.


66. Do you like long or short hair? Short hair

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? No

68. Favorite school subject? Foreign languages/Science

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Introvert!


70. Have you ever been scuba diving? No


71. What makes you nervous? Forced explanations and first time extreme experiences

72. Are you scared of the dark? No


73. Do you correct people when they made mistakes? Minsan.

74. Are you ticklish? Yes


75. Have you ever started a rumour? No


76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? Yes. Of my life.


77. Have you ever drank underage? Yes


78. Have you ever done drugs? Di pa.

79. Who was your first real crush? TJ


80. How many piercings do you have? A pair. 

81. Can you roll your Rs? Yes

82. How fast can you type? Moderate


83. How fast can you run? Slow


84. What color is your hair? Black


85. What color is your eyes? Black

86. What are you allergic to? Toxic people

87. Do you keep a journal? Yes

88. What do your parents do? Love us


89. Do you like your age? Yes

90. What makes you angry? Pag nagsinungaling ka sa’kin.

91. Do you like your own name? No. ๐Ÿ˜”


92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? Yes. Leia, Levi, Sofia

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child?
Both sana.

94. What are your strengths? Patience

95. What are your weaknesses? Obsessive tendencies and trust issues.

96. How did you get your name? Angel DAW ako sabi ng magulang ko ee.

97. Were your ancestors royalty? No. I wissshh haha.

98. Do you have any scars?Yes po. Heart pa lang ee. Char.
99. Color of your bedspread? Blue
100. Color of your room? Brown

IYAK

Gustong-gusto ko na umiyak ulit. Kasi nakakapagod. Nakakasawa na. Ang blanko ng puso ko. Pero mabigat din ito. May kulang. May hindi ako nagawa. May hindi ako nasabi. May nagawa akong mali. May nasabi akong mali. May mali akong pinili.May nawala ako. May inaantay ako. May pinag-antay ako. Nagamit ko nang mali ang oras ko, ang mga mata, tainga, paa, at kamay ko. At higit sa lahat, nagamit ko nang mali ang puso ko. 

Walang ibang pagpipilian kundi ang umiyak kaya lang hindi ako makahanap ng espasyo na ako lang mag-isa — yung walang makakarinig, walang makakakita para wala nang mag-alala at magtaka.

Magtatanong kasi sila.

“May nanakit ba sa’yo?”

“Nasingko mo ba yung major mo?”

“0 units ka ba sa CRS?”

“Iniwan ka ba nila?”

“‘Di ba sila nagyaya?”

“‘Di ba siya nagsabi?”

“Bakit ka umiiyak?”

Ayokong magpaliwanag nang inaayos ko pa yung puso ko. Ayokong magpaliwanag kung ako mismo, hindi alam kung papaano, kung ako mismo, hindi masagot yung mga tanong sa sarili ko. 

Ang hirap din naman ng umiiyak ka tapos magpapaliwanag ka, pero ‘di ka naman talaga nagpapaliwanag kasi nga ayaw mong mag-isip habang umiiyak. ‘Di ka rin naman nila maiintindihan kung ganun yung itsura mo. Siguro susubukan nilang lagyan ng lohika yung mga lumalabas sa bunganga po, pero mas malamang na kakawawaan ka nila habang nakatitig sila sa namumula mong mukha. Ewan ko lang sa iba, pero ‘pag may gumagawa sa akin ng ganun, mas napapagod yung isip ko. Ayoko na nga sanang mag-isip habang umiiyak tapos bibigyan mo pa ko ng rason para isipin kung anong iniisip mo tungkol sa akin at ss buhay ko. Malay ko ba kung hinuhusgahan mo na pala yung mga pinipili kong unahin sa buhay at kung gaano ako ka-hinang nilalang.

Basta kailangan ko lang ng espasyo para umiyak. ‘Yung gusto kong espasyo ay siyempre yung walang kahit sinong tao na pwedeng sumulpot na tititigan ka at magtatanong ng kung anu-ano. At siyempre kailangan ko rin ng oras. Siguro ayos na sa akin yung tatlong oras.

Sa ngayon mahirap pa, kasi lagi akong napapaligiran ng tao at kung makakahanap ako ng espasyo, hindi sapat ang oras para umiyak dahil susulpot din sila maya-maya. At kung makahanap man ako ng oras, wala namang espasyo para gawin iyon.

Basta. Gusto ko lang umiyak ulit nang matagal.

Sana bago matapos ang 2016 ay magawa ko ‘to.

Photo credits: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

๐Ÿ’— ?

How do you know if you’re really in love?

How do you know if the feeling is not merely an excitement?

How do you know that it is just not a crush?

What’s the difference between loving and being in love?

Can people really fall in love so fast? How can they tell?

dissonance

nakakatawa lang na ako pa yung sobrang lakas ng loob makapagsabi sa ibang tao na, “mind over matter. kung nega lagi yung nasa isip mo e malamang, nega rin ang magiging outcome niya” pero mayghad kung alam lang nila sobrang nahihirapan akong iapply ito in real life. hindi lang yung advice na ‘to ah. marami pang iba na ayoko na imention kasi nakakahiyang iinsinuate na duh ang hypocrite ko. di ko man lang maiapply sa sarili ko yung pinagpapayo ko sa iba. hay life. cognitive dissonance ata yung tawag dito sa psych. eto yung hindi daw parallel yung mga iniisip mo sa ginagawa mo. pano ba mawala ‘to? pero yung tunay na tanong ay, papaanong nagiging parallel yung thoughts and actions? possible ba yun? o sadyang nasanay na ako sa sarili ko na never yun nangyari for me?

nakakatawa rin na ang dami kong tanong pero di ako makahanap ng time para i-google. mas nakahanap pa ko ng time para magdrama dito.

Patawad

S: Namamasko po. / A: Patawad.

Patawad. Pwede bang sa susunod na lang ulit? Kung kakantahan mo ulit ako sa susunod, baka ibigay ko na yung hinihingi mo. Pero ngayon kasi ‘di ko pa yun maibibigay sa’yo kahit na nagustuhan ko yung inawit mo. Kailangan ko kasi munang unahin yung sarili ko. Kulang pa ‘ko at ayoko namang magbigay sa’yo nang kulang pa nga ako. Nang ‘di pa kumpleto ang pagkatao ko. 

Kung makapaghihintay ka, baka mabigyan kita sa susunod na Pasko. ‘Yun ay kung aawitan mo pa ‘ko. 

Photo credits: http://www.akoaypilipino.eu/libangan/libangan/life-style/pagdiriwang-ng-pasko-sa-pilipinas-kinilala-sa-website-ng-cnn.html

‘Wag na

โ€˜Wag mo na โ€˜kong lokohin

โ€˜Wag mo na โ€˜kong paikutin

โ€˜Wag mo โ€˜kong sabihan ng mga pangako kung ang mga ito naman ay blanko at sadyang mapanlinlang lamang na kinulayan upang may masabi.

โ€˜Wag na pakiusap.

Kung โ€˜di ka rin namang magiging totoo,

‘Wag na.

โ€˜Wag ย ako.